Sunday, March 13, 2011

Pursuit of the Poofy dress ...

Every one of us is given those special rites of passage: the things we wait patiently for, and are so excited when they arrive. Whether it's the upward movement of Cub Scouts to Boy Scouts, of the difference between a Junior and Senior Varsity Cheerleader. Meaningless changes that at the time seem to be everything.  We've all had them and saw them as some huge moment in time to redefine (or define) ourselves.


I went out for drinks ,with a girlfriend the other night. On both sides of the bar you could see people at different stages of their lives.  To my left there were the young, fun and rambunctious group: a gaggle of young 20-somethings (and a kid who looked as if, earlier that morning, he poured out a box of Fruity Pebbles to uncover the prize!) It was a perfectly depicted picture, of " date night" here on long Island! LOL   Then to the right sat a rather refined group of women (and one guy hitting on them all.) They were in their mid-forties, and appeared to be enjoying a glass of White Wine. 


So there I was, in the middle, with my Margarita - Not quite the beer-churgers of the group to my left, nor really ready to concede that happy hour meant a glass of White Wine. (Not just yet!)  I was talking about where I fit in, with my friend. We both discovered that: we were supposed to be married by now! Duh that's a no-brainer! I always said I'd be married  by 23 and have kids by 25, but to hear that someone else had the same plan- Woo Hoo! I was not out of my mind! So that got me thinking: WE ARE ALWAYS CHASING A POOFY DRESS! 


As a little girl, I watched my sister take dance lessons (she only took them for .2 seconds, but stay with me people!- It had impact!) I wanted a Tutu! OK five year old in a wheelchair - wasn't going to be dancing Swan Lake anytime soon! So I got a Wand! ( Luckily Ashly outgrew the Tutu fast!) My jealously lasted as long as her dance career! (And between you and me she feel asleep, on stage during her first recital!- so that career was over long before it started!)  So I lost out on Poofy dress #1 


Poofy dress was a bigger problem. That good ole Sweet Sixteen! I was excited for this one! This one I knew was mine. After all nothing could change my age! Invitations went out, favors were purchased, DJ selected, dress shopping here I come! But once again the Poofy dress eluded me! The month before my party, may parents could not afford the final payment. It was not in our budget. No matter how hard mom crunched the numbers, we really couldn't afford it. I had to call every person on my guest list to say my party was canceled.  In the town I grew up in, you didn't dare say that you couldn't afford something. I had an elaborate lie about a double booked venue, and my date had to be changed. I'm not sure anyone believed that, but hey - it's all I had at 16!


Junior prom was up next. This time I had the poofy dress. Being a "Little Person" you can't walk into JC Penny and buy formal gown off the rack.  My mom made my dress. It was a beautiful lilac dress with a shimmery Chiffon overlay, and rhinestone straps. I even found kids shoes that I dyed to match. For reasons that I'm still not clear on: I got stood up. Dress ready, hair done, and no date. He bailed last minute! So I spent prom night looking great (as great as a nerdy girl, stood up for her Junior prom could look!) watching "Mission Impossible." (If only Tom Cruise could have seen me!)  I didn't even attempt Senior Prom! 


I have a closet full of fitted, "sexy" dresses! Many of those I've only worn once, and normally to wedding. I've come to terms with the fact that "poofy dresses" are not for me! After all, being 4' tall, I look like a CUPCAKE when I have on poofy dress! :) 


Now the last Poofy dress I am not willing to give up on! There is no way I'll be trading in my final shot a  poofy dress for a box of Kitty Litter. (I don't like cats so if I become the "crazy- cat -lady please shoot me!)


I say this all light-heartedly to say it is JUST A POOFY DRESS!! It's not a rite of passage as we all think they are. We feel obligated to have them and give them. Yet, we are no more or less fulfilled because we went to Prom or had a rockin' Sweet 16. Pursue the important stuff. Life's biggest accomplishments wont include a dress you'll never look at, or put on again! And probably wont look as good as you thought it did, when you look at the pictures!  

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